under

still feeling under the weather. i woke up last night and got up to get some orajel for my teeth because the novocain had wore off and it had knocked me out. it looked like a chipmunk or as if i had gotten punched in the face. it didn’t hurt it just felt swollen. kind of laid in bed for a little longer then i should have. finally had gotten up and did something. started cleaning but kept sneezing. i think i sneezed over a thousand times today alone. made me some chicken for dinner, i really hope the vitamins help me get better. i can’t even talk right. i hope all had a good day. take care of yourselves folks. time for me to sleep to make what ever i have go away. good night and sweet dreams. thanks folks, i’ll live, i hope. i love y’all.

trying

i am trying. trying to leave my mark. today has shown me what i need to do in order to achieve even thinking of making a mark in the communities. everyone was asking me if something was wrong because i have never gotten after anyone the way i did today. i did have to get after a few kids. was trying to teach them about respect. in order to be respected you have to give it first. that was one of the biggest morals i was taught while growing up and has stayed with me ever since. a code like the kids like to call it is not learn on the streets but should be learned at home first. in no way am i saying i am perfect human being because many people who really know me know that i am not perfect, i am just watching what i do in life to learn from it and to leave a legacy. i have heard that word everywhere today. in the store, work, books, thoughts, television, etc. if that isn’t a sign i don’t know what is. so far the day has gone, i am having this weird feeling that i have never had before; ever.

acquire

today when i woke up from a wonderful dream i thought i had heard a noise. i washed my face and headed out the back door at my parents house. i had to go because my brother wanted to see a movie and i tagged along and when it finished i joined him to my parents with nothing but the clothes on me and my handy dandy iphone. after stepping outside i heard a clank. i asked myself; what is that noise?! it turns out it was three kittens. i was only able to get a hold of one while the others scrambled. it was funny because the other two ran one way and the one i caught ran into a box and it looked like he was disappointed from being caught. lol. it got me thinking while i held it in my hands; “wow! i have a small living organism in my hands right now.” for that moment i realized it was safe in my hands then from the world beyond my hands. if need be; i was able to protect a life. it also reminded me of what i used to do with you, i tried to protect you secretively. just so if something were to go wrong i always played out the senario out in my head for everything. i am just paranoid about life sometimes.

“life. it is so precious.”

i was also remembered of this test i took recently for a job to help lives. i was asked a question about my life, i answered as truthfully as i could. i did and i am in. as the day went on the day involved more lives to enter in my view. for the first time in many months we were all together. in a way that brought a smile to my face and the almost feeling of having something in my eye. ever since i was told, i have been more appreciative of all life. now with my current position i am able to help those who just need a little push in the right direction. i show what good can come. i think i found my niche. everyone has their own story to tell and it is interesting to listen. i know there are days where i need to talk but from a philosophical point i just need someone to hear me out and i would take what ever is told to me in consideration. even though i have been shut out from somethings i still have a lot to learn. given the opportunity i will continue to help others. i was asked why that makes me happy this weekend and my response to my brother was i like seeing people happy, if i can make one change and that person carries it on to another then i have just started a chain. if i were to help a hundred people and more then half carried it on that is still okay with me because i would know i made the attempt to help when no one else ever would. he was stunned by my answer; speechless to be exact.

after joining my visiting parents to the store, i saw a bunch of camping gear and now trying to plan a camping trip. it has been over two years now since i have been. it is now that time to reconnect with nature. i hope i can get it before turkey day or before winter is here. it is getting late now and have a busy day tomorrow. i hope all had a great day. good night and sweet dreams.

fact

i missed class. yeah i over slept. i also fell asleep on my homework. mind you i got three things going on back to back. yeah it is tough. i gave you my word and i intend to follow through with it. even with everything happening. i was able to square a few things today. i am home from trying to do everything when all i need is a break but everything just keeps coming back. looks like i won’t be going anywhere this weekend, which is good, but at the same time i will be working. i have too. my career is depending on this one now. i did have a busy day, it is now over and completing my homework right now. i hope all had a better day. stay safe out there. good night and sweet dreams.

bee

the phrase “busy bee” sounds just about right, right about now. i woke up at seven in the morning to get ready for school, went to school, class was cancelled, went home, made me a good breakfast, got ready for work, went in early, worked, went to lunch, came back to work, worked some more, went home, grabbed a few items for mandatory meet with professor at museum, went through exhibits, met back up with the class, stayed a little longer, went home again, took a power nap, and got up and am now ready for tomorrow. in between some of those i had to take tumbler out to do his business, drive and snack or eat. if that is not a busy day i don’t know what could be. i really hope all had a good day. good night and sweet dreams and happy dreaming.

quidense

arrows

what a right, left, up and down kind of day. woke up and went to class, it was cancelled. i jumped right back into bed and left everything alone and was down for the count. woke back up and make a quick snack and changed and headed out. i know our meeting was strange, i just wasn’t sure on my time and if i would be able to make my mark. i was able to make it through traffic and make it there with a little extra time then expected. was called in and was out of there a while later. began reading a book i had been meaning to read and have gotten halfway through it. by the time i got home it began to pour. moments later got a call, was unpleasant. now i have got to try for my next choice. i am really hoping for this one, i don’t think i will ever be able to win everyone over. was worth a shot (pun intended). while browsing i saw this and feel i should post it.

“the more you nurture a feeling of loving-kindness, the happier and calmer you will be.” -Dalai Lama

i hope all had a great day. to all i wish them a good night and to dream that dream.

always around

strobe

is it crazy to say that my life just flashed before my eyes. what a day of doing everything i can, i know there is more meaning to this world and i am bound to find out what it will be. whoever enjoys a journey follow it, now you can’t say no one never told you as it has been told to me.

“it is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you will be”

no matter what, i shoot for the small to make the climb to the bigger. because what if fine isn’t good enough? what if what we search for is extraordinary. i am scared; everyday. our time is right here! right now! give it your all because there may not be another opportunity like the one that is in front of you. i just had this sort of feeling stir up in me these past few hours because the first step to better times is to imagine them. hope all had a wonderful day. may all have a good night and dream that dream.

inc

well even today as crazy as it was couldn’t have gone any other way. i was able to send out some emails to a few takers and just waiting on their response. (keeping fingers crossed) having to go on to other things but in the mean time trying to get every right. in the morning was able to make a few tacos for a quick bite and then hit the books. took a few breaks while studying, well more like a long break, caught a movie and then went back to the books.

“i am responsible. determined. driven. & committed. i am history in the making.”

i was went crazy when the little one showed up. and was able to spend some time with the family all together, clean, organize and get everything done before the week starts. has been a good week and a new one is about to begin soon. 😉 que todos tengan una buena noche y que sueñen el sueño.

el sueño 

sure

while on my second run i began think, am i doing the right thing? even though this internship is easy i am feeling it is wrong all at the same time. yes it is an internship but on the other hand it has nothing to do with my profession. i thought it to be at first. but now i’m not so sure. i been told not to waste time because it will be difficult to catch up. as true as it may be that and among other things have been racing through one half of my brain and as far as the other half it is on this huge quiz i have been dreading. even if i could stop time i think it is way too much information for a quiz but i was able to attend a online study session that helped some. i do hope i don’t forget any small details that i really need to know. as far as today did what and maybe more then i needed too but can’t worry about that too much, need all my focus on school for the next ten hours. i hope all had a great day, it is time for me to sign off and sleep. have a wonderful night and sweet dreams.

con mucho carino

trying

been trying all day. i don’t know how you do it?! i am not giving up just yet. still isn’t music to my ears yet, everything seems to fit but just doesn’t feel right. got lots of editing to do still. i am just waiting on your feedback. hopefully with that i can get it down just right. but for now going to get my mind off of this and try to watch a movie but feeling too tired to even try to get up and set up or choose. looks like an early bed time for me. what was your day like?

djHemi

beat

today was strange, woke up to a crazy dream, was able to see in thermal imaging. as if i had bionic eyes. it was weird and also strange. as the day carried on my mom got a phone call, it was my dad. she could hear something was wrong in his voice right away. i have that gift too, being observant helps too. i was outside trying to tire out tumbler so he could sleep better at night. when i came inside my mom told me what happened, i fed tumbler really fast and jumped in the car and drove to the rescue. i know i have no medical skills or a phd, but i know how to take care of the issue at hand (pun intended.) after thirty years not one time has this happened. normally in a situation like this their woud be panic, and forgot to mention my mother was with me. she gets queazy about the situation when blood is involved. i am perfectly okay with it and have no negative reaction to the sign of blood. i did everything i could to stay alert, assertive and collected, even though i was scared out of my life to find out what happened, i had to imagine what happen and play it in my head as if it were showed on a video. everything is fine for now, on the way there and while helping, i kept seeing worse case scenarios. i know not all of them could happen, but i had to slow down my heart rate so my dad wouldn’t see the scared look in my eye. the injuries weren’t severe but they were still their. i was able to do what i had to do to my dads hand before or maybe possible later injury. i could be quite a healer under pressure, i have seen some people crack, it isn’t a good thing. i am just glad everything is okay, not sure what will happen tomorrow, i have to help out my dad, it will be tough but he can handle pain, it may have been the adrenaline but he stayed calm through it all, even when i had press, move, rotate the injured area. it seems that so far these past two days have been about something important, i now see that. what we discussed yesterday came true; in it’s own way. i hope you get well soon. it was hard to take the strange felling in my throat and make it go away. sort of felt like someone was trying to strangle me, i had to push my way through but got to the other side.

get well soon

depth

it has been quite some time that i have look into depth of things. i feel we are only configured to see what we choose too, it isn’t until someone else can see what we don’t that we begin to realize what actually is going on around/with us. many people would say i would wear my heart on my sleeve which may come to be true but i just never saw it that way, i always saw myself as hidden or secretive to hide emotions that i wouldn’t want others too see. but i was wrong, i got into a serious conversation with my friend, i have known him for more than five years and would consider him my best friend. he tells it to me straight even though i may not see what he does. i know i have limited people that are true friends, but even though i have many friends they do things that are uncomfortable for me due to my past experiences that i don’t like. i can’t change them because no one should be told how to run their lives. life should be valued and appreciated. i try my hardest to be a good son, friend, etc but i guess i am not. if i can’t put differences aside what good am i as a friend? am i worthless and just a waste of entity?? what have i done to upset anyone lately, please tell me? today was a huge eye opener. i think in order for me to be a way better person somethings that i do may have to change. there are just things i can’t do anymore that i have given up, like for instance; watching tv, two years ago i was presented with an opportunity to not watch tv anymore, many think it was a radical thing to do but it actually worked in favor for me, i got out and became active, not to mention having a dog was a bit more responsibility too. my dog means the world to me, even though i have only had him for two years, he is my best friend. without him i don’t know what i would have done. i am just having epiphanies left and right but this may just be a phase but i want to do what ever it takes to be the best. all what you told me today was the truth, i never knew you had that bottled up inside you, i wish you would have told me sooner, i would have like to know sooner. i am very observent but i am not perfect, i know this, we all have flaws and i told you yours. but that is just what i see, what you do with the information is your choice. thanks.

to being appreciative