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Tag Archives: wrong

really quick, i have been busy all day. i have not stopped writing and running around everywhere. yeah i thought today would be easy but i guessed wrong. the funniest part of my day was during work, i had a little bit of time and did some quick research and was able to write a report. i really didn’t want them to find out i was doing school work on company time so when someone would pass by or ask me a question i quickly minimized my window. they spread a rumor i was internal affairs trying to see what was the dirt to have someone fired. i went along with it but played it off really well. always answering a question with another question. was able to only get half of it done, after work i made a quick dash home to change clothes and headed to school library. got some more sources for my reports. took me a while to find a few sources but by the time i knew it the school library was closing. headed home and am almost done but going to have to wake up early to finish it. hope all had a good day. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

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i am trying. trying to leave my mark. today has shown me what i need to do in order to achieve even thinking of making a mark in the communities. everyone was asking me if something was wrong because i have never gotten after anyone the way i did today. i did have to get after a few kids. was trying to teach them about respect. in order to be respected you have to give it first. that was one of the biggest morals i was taught while growing up and has stayed with me ever since. a code like the kids like to call it is not learn on the streets but should be learned at home first. in no way am i saying i am perfect human being because many people who really know me know that i am not perfect, i am just watching what i do in life to learn from it and to leave a legacy. i have heard that word everywhere today. in the store, work, books, thoughts, television, etc. if that isn’t a sign i don’t know what is. so far the day has gone, i am having this weird feeling that i have never had before; ever.

O_o

papers. papers. papers. so much trees being used up today. have stayed away from my computer all day until a few hours ago. today was just handed a boat load of work and on top of that i already have work to do for school. i decided to stay home and head to work early. they had told me to brace myself. i really thought they were joking. i was wrong. when someone sounds sincere they mostly are telling the truth. i was told what ever i didn’t finish to come in tomorrow to finish up. i didn’t want to decline the offer because i think it was a test to see how far i can be pushed, i did let them know even though it was a holiday i still had class to go to in the morning. i will be there after school to finish up. as the day came to an end i knew what was ahead. well not really because i got a feeling to read. read i did. it had been a while since looking at a few things, once you are blocked there is not much you can do but wonder. i tried wishing for certain things but when that failed me i started wishing for things to happen. in a way they were granted. i am very happy they did. i think that now that you are back in my life i can stop worrying about how you are and can ask you instead of imagining the worst. i am taking this leap to reach out in baby steps. i don’t want to ruin or rub the world in the wrong way. when you really left me it felt like the whole world did too. even my best friend stopped talking with me. no one was talking to me and i was going to school with no ambition to continue but i stuck with it because i have paid for classes out of my pocket and need them to graduate. but i can graciously say that today has gotten so much better. i think i just needed someone to spill some stuff too and before i texted you my best friend called me, but recently got in touch with me a few days before i went camping and has slightly refrained from being distant. i have seen too many papers for a day that i am taking a break from writing my reports and going to bed. it is tmie for bed and you have made my day from crappy to way way way better. i do wish i could say something but i wont. thanks. have a great night and very much sweet dreams. missed you so.

O_o

what a day. damn i think i may have slept wrong or lifted something wrong. my back is hurting. well i hope everything went well today. i should be finding out pretty soon. i am anxious to know what has to be said. even with a retake i am nervous. finished homework and just about everything else for today. am ready for bed and will be making it an early night. i think tomorrow will be just as busy. i will know a lot more tomorrow. hope all had a better day. it is that time. good night and dream happy dreams nd stay safe.

creo O_o

while on my second run i began think, am i doing the right thing? even though this internship is easy i am feeling it is wrong all at the same time. yes it is an internship but on the other hand it has nothing to do with my profession. i thought it to be at first. but now i’m not so sure. i been told not to waste time because it will be difficult to catch up. as true as it may be that and among other things have been racing through one half of my brain and as far as the other half it is on this huge quiz i have been dreading. even if i could stop time i think it is way too much information for a quiz but i was able to attend a online study session that helped some. i do hope i don’t forget any small details that i really need to know. as far as today did what and maybe more then i needed too but can’t worry about that too much, need all my focus on school for the next ten hours. i hope all had a great day, it is time for me to sign off and sleep. have a wonderful night and sweet dreams.

con mucho carino O_o

today had to have been one of my most discovered days yet. was up early and while up and having breakfast before school i could only fill a cup of the last of the orange juice and had a full bottle of apple juice and decided to mix them together; i am sure everyone has seen orange juice and pineapple mixed together and other flavors mixed with orange juice, my discovery of orange juice and apple was awesome. =}}

while in class; we were finishing up our introduction portion of the syllabus day(s) i discovered there are three students named orlando, it was kind of exciting to know that there are others out there with my same first name because i have actually met a person back in high school that had my name as their last name. and also was the only criminal justice major in the class, i was expecting a lot more but i was wrong. there was people in the nursing, biology, chemistry, kinesiology, etc. field that i was surprised about how diverse of a class we were and of course our class ended and school went on.

on my home after school, i had to stop to put gas when i discovered a older man smoking a cigar while he was pumping gas, need i say it? i will. what a moron! after that i went to the store to get me some lunch and groceries  to make dinner later tonight. while paying i over read something that said “lips lie. eyes don’t.” which i find to believe to be true. i haver never thought about that until now and makes very much sense to me.

arrived back home and rested a bit to try to get my homework and reading done before continuing on my day. i was able to complete what i needed too and went to discover soreness from the gym. it had only been two days since i hadn’t gone and already my muscle memory was tightening and stiffening up my joints. was done with workout and headed home.

after cleaning up and resting for a bit, i found out my mom had already made dinner and i had to put my new discovery of a new recipe to make mac’n’cheese away for tomorrow for lunch or dinner or maybe both. since my friend had discovered out that i had never seen the exorcist he insisted i see it. i just finished it several minutes ago, it was cheesy but it wasn’t as bad as i expected it to be. but i had discovered many many many years ago ‘pet cemetery’ and ‘it’ were scary.

i think today was a day discovery, i learned a lot just from one day. let’s see what discoveries are in store for us tomorrow. hope everyone had a great day today. have a good night folks, this is e signing off from another adventurous day.

O_o

been trying all day. i don’t know how you do it?! i am not giving up just yet. still isn’t music to my ears yet, everything seems to fit but just doesn’t feel right. got lots of editing to do still. i am just waiting on your feedback. hopefully with that i can get it down just right. but for now going to get my mind off of this and try to watch a movie but feeling too tired to even try to get up and set up or choose. looks like an early bed time for me. what was your day like?

djHemi O_o

today was strange, woke up to a crazy dream, was able to see in thermal imaging. as if i had bionic eyes. it was weird and also strange. as the day carried on my mom got a phone call, it was my dad. she could hear something was wrong in his voice right away. i have that gift too, being observant helps too. i was outside trying to tire out tumbler so he could sleep better at night. when i came inside my mom told me what happened, i fed tumbler really fast and jumped in the car and drove to the rescue. i know i have no medical skills or a phd, but i know how to take care of the issue at hand (pun intended.) after thirty years not one time has this happened. normally in a situation like this their woud be panic, and forgot to mention my mother was with me. she gets queazy about the situation when blood is involved. i am perfectly okay with it and have no negative reaction to the sign of blood. i did everything i could to stay alert, assertive and collected, even though i was scared out of my life to find out what happened, i had to imagine what happen and play it in my head as if it were showed on a video. everything is fine for now, on the way there and while helping, i kept seeing worse case scenarios. i know not all of them could happen, but i had to slow down my heart rate so my dad wouldn’t see the scared look in my eye. the injuries weren’t severe but they were still their. i was able to do what i had to do to my dads hand before or maybe possible later injury. i could be quite a healer under pressure, i have seen some people crack, it isn’t a good thing. i am just glad everything is okay, not sure what will happen tomorrow, i have to help out my dad, it will be tough but he can handle pain, it may have been the adrenaline but he stayed calm through it all, even when i had press, move, rotate the injured area. it seems that so far these past two days have been about something important, i now see that. what we discussed yesterday came true; in it’s own way. i hope you get well soon. it was hard to take the strange felling in my throat and make it go away. sort of felt like someone was trying to strangle me, i had to push my way through but got to the other side.

get well soon O_o

today was perplexed, i was confused and forgot a lot of things today. not really sure why though. today wasn’t too shabby, stayed in bed for the morning, and when i got up decided to wash the car, only cleaned it half way the other day and today completely finished it all. it was way to hot to do anything, i stayed inside talking and playing with tumbler. started to do some light research, i am way too confused to make a strong solid decision. they say being indecisive leaves room for flexibility, it is slightly true, when i wasn’t able to go one route i was always able to find another to get to my destination. is that wrong?! i still got where i wanted to be but took longer then expected. but even with a decision like this i am looking at every factor, good and bad, right and wrong. from what i read it says not to make a decision yet because time will come where i will need to make the choice and will be the right one. as far as that tomorrow will be a indecisive day. i know what i have to do and it is a must to get my degree but what will i choose?!?! i am still not too sure yet. we will see. in conclusion let’s see what tomorrow brings, one day at a time. hope you are well, how was you week(end)?

to decision making O_o

today was just another crazy day in the life i own, it started off by me looking into a dream diary on a dream i had, seemed good. it felt like a good day or so i thought. i was told that a certain document would rise after today and was in a hurry trying to locate an old document, turned my car and house upside-down looking for it. i took several hours and couldn’t find it that i called my mom and asked her, she rummaged through my stuff at her house and nothing. she told me to go get a new one, got ready as fast as possible and bolted out. well i couldn’t locate the place and in the midst of it, made a accidental call. finally got a hold of my mom to see if i could get help locating where i needed to go. eureka i had found it twenty minutes later. (you already know this but had to let you know i was okay, didn’t want you to think something could be wrong and make you worry or wonder why.) while waiting i finally get called up to the front, they just let me know that i couldn’t get what i was looking for and was sent to the main building downtown. i wanted to avoid traffic at all cost to make time because it was already  getting near the deadline. made it downtown and again took a wild guess where this place was since i used a loop hole to avoid paying internet on my phone because i never really used it, but today of all days; i needed it! parked. ran up inside and there was a two hour wait, you think a fuck my life moment right, wrong it got worse. got my document and rushed home to get the paperwork, etc. and headed to a place to get my documents. it turns out where we were going was through the other door where i had just gotten done getting my old-new-document, again another fuck my life moment, but even then it gets worse. made it there and almost did a tuck and roll, ran up to the back of the line and asked if this was the line to get it, was told yeah! then a lady came out and asked if i was signed in, told her no and she decides to drop the *BOMB* on me and said five o’clock was the cut-off point and i was four minutes late! that was more embarrassing then anything, mind you there were about a fifty people listening. walked away as fast i could and drove home. was having some mixed feelings about it all. then when we got home my aunt and mom and uncle start talking and everything they were saying was making me wonder if it was even worth buying anymore, if he isn’t going to listen then what’s the point! i’m going to try again tomorrow and see how it goes from there. after all that turmoil we get a call by our cousins who we rarely talk too needing my dads help, we go and visit them and after some later inspection and being on the roof, it looks like i will be headed back to work earlier then expected with my dad and we start tomorrow. in conclusion that was my crazy adventure for the day. how was your adventure? or your day go?

to rethinking O_o

“earth, air, fire and water are the four elements of life, each one can stand on it’s own and can also help one another or hurt one another, they are each a different state but all connected as one.” i just had an epiphany while being outside trying to help, i look up and reminded me of what we talked about, it came to mind old friend, buddy, ol’ pal, i can see and do things that may cloud your judgement but the things you say are not meant to knock me down but you don’t see it that way, when you speak you may find truth in the words by the way you perceive it. i on the other hand don’t see it that way, but we all need a little help sometimes looking at things from another point of view. whether what you think is right and wrong for you, is just that, it is for YOU and not me.

if you feel the things you say may hurt me, think again, nothing can bring me down, back then maybe, i used to be a push over, back then, now not so much but every now and then i do see a little of me falling into that state. we have been through and seen a lot. when i see you i can see past all the mess and can see the truth. we are one in the same; like a yin yang; you know my strengths and my weaknesses just i can read yours. things got a little sour during the conversation but we came to an understanding, what you want in life is totally up to you and your destiny to follow, not mine, and vise versa. i look at the big picture in everything and correct me if i am wrong but i think you just see what you want to see.

as i was standing outside trying to help i went into a different state of mind that i haven’t ever been, everything was so clear, like it just went *poof* but when i was interrupted it all went away. whether it is because of something, i can achieve greatness. you just have to let me, as i am about to let you. what ever may come of my new ideals, i don’t really know. i hope for the best for me as i do for all.

in conclusion, i don’t know how this will get to you but i am sending to you. how you take it is up to you. what you do with it is up to you. but as far as for me; here i go!

e.a.f.w.l. O_o

everyone always talks about time as if it is something we can control, how time works i really don’t know, came across something today; “time doesn’t heal anything, it just teaches us how to live with the pain.” – Naomi Remen, which i find to be true, i have said it before and i will say it again, i have seen my version of hell and back and i don’t like it one bit, i would never wish anything i have seen or done upon someone. there are things that i have seen and have happen that i wish no one would ever have to go through, but i guess if it doesn’t happen, we wouldn’t be able to learn to change or fix situations. talking about things does help, but the person you really want to talk can’t help in any which way or form. does the perception they have of the situation help any by repeating it? or does the advice given be taken or heard when the situation at hand has never happen to them?? i am just trying to do the best thing but am i doing the right thing??? everyone always says “follow you heart” and some concur that the heart is just an organ unlike the brain which has a side that no one can see but oneself and listen to it too. can it be that giving up is the answer, some say it’s a lost cause and is not my burden to carry but when in reality it is as much burden as anyone else? i am feeling that i am becoming something i said i would never be, how or what can i do to change this?? if anyone has ever felt this way, what is the best advice that can be passed on? in conclusion, do i speak and ask for help or do i keep my mouth shut and carry on my day, like any other?!?!

to feeling … O_o