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Well the day has finally come. I passed all my exams and was cleared for surgurey next week. I have been dreading this moment but now it looks as if it’s written in black and white in the appointment book. I am nervous yet excited to know that after this I don’t have to worry any more and can rest easier.

whatever happens O_o

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today i was woken up early by my dreams. it was like what happens on inception, a dream within a dream, i was walking through a mall and with a co-worker and telling him different things when out of the blue i hear my name called i turn and turn to try to find where that voice was coming from. i was getting anxious and then kept walking and talking, moments later i could see a figure of  some sort pixelating in front of me; while this is happening my co-worker is still talking and walking; what i saw i didn’t know because i began thinking in my head to wake up. before that an arm tried grabbing me and then at that moment it was as if i could see myself waking up but it was still a dream. then in the distant could hear tumbler barking and it got louder to where i did actuall wake up for real.

after that it was early and i was able to make me a healthy breakfast and throw on a pot of coffee, sure enough i downed two cups before leaving to school and took a third with me. went to school took my test and realized some of the questions i didn’t know must of been the ones i missed class because i overslept. it is to early to tell but i don’t know how i did and wont find out until my final on next friday. after that i made it home to grab my stuff for work and headed to work.

when i arrived i greeted all co-workers and couldn’t remember for the life of me what my co-worker in my dream was telling. he was running around everywhere and i never got a chance to converse with the guy and i got busy working the whole day. i was curious and was trying to see how i was doing so far and started talking with the supervisor and he said i was doing good but to slow down on working so much, i was taking work from the others because i am asking for more work. lol. i was taken to lunch by some of the guys at work, i think the talk i had with them they finally trust me. returned and got straight to work. i think i was more distracted today by everyone then i ever have. i’m the youngest one there, it wasn’t too long ago that i was in the shoes of the kids that come and go. i had finished my last set of paper work on the deadline a few minutes before leaving. once i left for home that was that.

i arrived home and arrived early so i changed really fast and headed to the park to go running with my dog, again. since i arrived early to the park it was still some daylight out, i did my thing and it was too early to go home i decided to go another mile or so and then return home. it turned out just perfect. i was able to run a bit more in a short period of time. then returned home.

after arriving home got my sandwich out and ate before starting back up on my work i have to catch up on. it is a lot and i just woke up from a half hour nap i took. i have to get to work early tomorrow and will be going to sleep after getting ready for bed. i hope all had a good day and a safe night. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

what can i say, today was a wild card. woke up from a dream; the dream happen to be a day i will always remember, it was before i moved while at school. i was always shy but that day something changed. still looking for the possible meaning behind it. while in school the professor let us know that our test would be this friday and our final the next. i will admit i have to do good on both to pass. after class i talked with the chairman and after a few explanations and some gatherings of paperwork, i was given the last and final slot of the internship program for next semester, i was able to beat a few people on the waiting list. i can feel a strange feeling coming over me know, don’t know how to really explain it but we will see what happens. while at work i was put straight to work, somedays it’s slow others not so much, i was here, there, jumping from one place to another, going to different buildings to turn stuff in and get files too. on the return trip home it was getting a bit colder but i knew what i had to do. i arrived home prepped the tumbler and changed clothes and headed to the park. today wasn’t as cold as it was yesterday. it felt good to forget about everything for an hour and concentrate on not getting hit or kidnapped. lol. after arriving back home i started on the things i needed to catch up on. it is a lot of work but it is asking for very little, will continue this the whole weekend and finals week too. that was my adventure for the day. i hope all had a good day and it is time for me to sleep. good night and sweet dreams to you.

O_o

papers. papers. papers. so much trees being used up today. have stayed away from my computer all day until a few hours ago. today was just handed a boat load of work and on top of that i already have work to do for school. i decided to stay home and head to work early. they had told me to brace myself. i really thought they were joking. i was wrong. when someone sounds sincere they mostly are telling the truth. i was told what ever i didn’t finish to come in tomorrow to finish up. i didn’t want to decline the offer because i think it was a test to see how far i can be pushed, i did let them know even though it was a holiday i still had class to go to in the morning. i will be there after school to finish up. as the day came to an end i knew what was ahead. well not really because i got a feeling to read. read i did. it had been a while since looking at a few things, once you are blocked there is not much you can do but wonder. i tried wishing for certain things but when that failed me i started wishing for things to happen. in a way they were granted. i am very happy they did. i think that now that you are back in my life i can stop worrying about how you are and can ask you instead of imagining the worst. i am taking this leap to reach out in baby steps. i don’t want to ruin or rub the world in the wrong way. when you really left me it felt like the whole world did too. even my best friend stopped talking with me. no one was talking to me and i was going to school with no ambition to continue but i stuck with it because i have paid for classes out of my pocket and need them to graduate. but i can graciously say that today has gotten so much better. i think i just needed someone to spill some stuff too and before i texted you my best friend called me, but recently got in touch with me a few days before i went camping and has slightly refrained from being distant. i have seen too many papers for a day that i am taking a break from writing my reports and going to bed. it is tmie for bed and you have made my day from crappy to way way way better. i do wish i could say something but i wont. thanks. have a great night and very much sweet dreams. missed you so.

O_o

what a quick day today was. everything from waking up early to even getting ready and heading to school. staying after to finish a test and heading to work. even at work they asked me what was wrong with me because i looked like a speed demon. i was hitting everything and knocking it out with unbearable speeds. it was as if i had eyes in every direction and a hundred arms. it was awesome. i have never finished work so fast before. and ti top it off i asked for more work to do. who asks for more work?! well i did and i was looked at as a person who was insane. with many little things to do i was able to knock those out. stayed a little after work talking to some coworkers. i was only able to hear a short brief of their life stories because i had to run to the stores. friday came up faster then i was expecting it. i am heading to the camp grounds tomorrow after work. no technology. which means a back draft of my post for that day. my first one ever. i will just be me and nature for a day to relax. relaxing is all i am doing oh and of course writing and documenting everything. from what i have looked up some adventure are in my midst. i am excited. as i write this right now i am sipping on some tea and getting drowsy. it is looking like a way early night for me. i am officially done with my tea and soon to be done writing. i love you. i love you. i love you. i am grateful to have each and everyone of you in my life, no matter the circumstances. i know you may never hear it from my mouth but i mean it with all of my heart. thank you. well folks, i hope y’all had a great day. it is time for some sleep. good night and sweet dreams.

dance O_o

i knew when i woke up this morning today would not be easy, sure enough it wasn’t. class was the only easy part of my day it was just note taking, well not very many since the professor got sidetracked and carried on about one thing to the next, i think he might possibly have an attention disorder or since it’s his last semester, he doesn’t care. after school i headed home, checked my online assignment and profesor posted we are having a take home quiz due by midnight of tomorrow and a pop test, she called it a pop test because she never mentioned anything in class about it and if you don’t check your online page it is a surprise for the next time you come into class. didn’t have time to study then because i had a long day of people to meet and files and letters to write. work went better then expected, i was able to finish up early but was given a second assignment, took me a little longer then expected. got home and now studying. i hope this test is easy but i will find out tomorrow. going to continue studying but it looks like i may be going to sleep. hope all had a good day. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

woah, had a super busy day. first i was woken up at three in the morning because it was really cold, grabbed the bigger blanket and went straight to sleep before i knew it i was dreaming. it was pretty amazing, it is the nearly the second time i have had it, from what i have been told the more it repeats it is likely to happen. if it happens i won’t let the moment pass me by. after that i woke up expecting an easy day. it is friday and almost a candy holiday. i was really cold that for the first time in a while i pulled out carol; my favorite fur hoodie, i went to school and finally my professor decides to give us some news; he said it would be good news and then dropped the test bomb on us today, it is on monday, so much for me trying to have a relaxing weekend. he went through the last chapter very quickly and by the time i began to realize i was missing some notes my arm started to cramp up. i think it the cold and when i got hit in my forearm a long time ago but luckily what ever i missed was recorded on my phone. i hope i can hear it. after that i headed into work, i was also expecting something off since it already happened before. sure enough, i was handed about fifty letters or more to write and make a envelope for and mail out. they said what ever i didn’t finish i could come in on saturday and finish or save until monday. i decided to get through them all. i even skipped lunch to try and get as much done as possible. finally brought a grilled chicken sandwich and scarfed it down for a quarter lunch and went back to work. i had to stay after hours with another coworker who was finishing up some other work. finally finished about an hour later then usual. turned in all the letters to the mail room and filled a a small basket. headed home and traffic was still heavy and made my way home. i wanted so bad to sleep but with the little energy i had stayed awake. i changed into something more comfortable and just laid on the couch. went to the store and got me a grilled turkey sub, i jammed it up with all the vegetables and more with some mustard and a jug of water. i was so full, the water did most of the trick. i think i need a break from everything. i am going to take that camping trip next week. jut for a day or two. going to see if i can retrieve my tent back and off i go. it is settled. i am already for bed and it is early, i am feeling like an old timer. stay safe out there. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

today when i woke up from a wonderful dream i thought i had heard a noise. i washed my face and headed out the back door at my parents house. i had to go because my brother wanted to see a movie and i tagged along and when it finished i joined him to my parents with nothing but the clothes on me and my handy dandy iphone. after stepping outside i heard a clank. i asked myself; what is that noise?! it turns out it was three kittens. i was only able to get a hold of one while the others scrambled. it was funny because the other two ran one way and the one i caught ran into a box and it looked like he was disappointed from being caught. lol. it got me thinking while i held it in my hands; “wow! i have a small living organism in my hands right now.” for that moment i realized it was safe in my hands then from the world beyond my hands. if need be; i was able to protect a life. it also reminded me of what i used to do with you, i tried to protect you secretively. just so if something were to go wrong i always played out the senario out in my head for everything. i am just paranoid about life sometimes.

“life. it is so precious.”

i was also remembered of this test i took recently for a job to help lives. i was asked a question about my life, i answered as truthfully as i could. i did and i am in. as the day went on the day involved more lives to enter in my view. for the first time in many months we were all together. in a way that brought a smile to my face and the almost feeling of having something in my eye. ever since i was told, i have been more appreciative of all life. now with my current position i am able to help those who just need a little push in the right direction. i show what good can come. i think i found my niche. everyone has their own story to tell and it is interesting to listen. i know there are days where i need to talk but from a philosophical point i just need someone to hear me out and i would take what ever is told to me in consideration. even though i have been shut out from somethings i still have a lot to learn. given the opportunity i will continue to help others. i was asked why that makes me happy this weekend and my response to my brother was i like seeing people happy, if i can make one change and that person carries it on to another then i have just started a chain. if i were to help a hundred people and more then half carried it on that is still okay with me because i would know i made the attempt to help when no one else ever would. he was stunned by my answer; speechless to be exact.

after joining my visiting parents to the store, i saw a bunch of camping gear and now trying to plan a camping trip. it has been over two years now since i have been. it is now that time to reconnect with nature. i hope i can get it before turkey day or before winter is here. it is getting late now and have a busy day tomorrow. i hope all had a great day. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

wow what a day. professor has now re-re-rescheduled our test. everyone one complains about him but i think since he is retiring he doesn’t care anymore and i really think everyone complains just to make conversation. he just wants the semester to be over to leave. he said he wasn’t going to finish off the year just the fall semester and leave. students have been saying they will drop and i think they have because we went from thirty five students to about less then twenty show up for class daily. after class headed to my future career and got some exciting news. looks like more hard work is in my near future. like really difficult classes. after all that noise went to work, work was work and then headed home. i heard something clicking in my tires on the way home. i checked it out when i got home and i come to find that in some crazy attempt to pop or slash my rear tire i found a broken piece of a utility knife. after further inspection it looks like the blade broke just short of actually puncturing the tire. crazy thing is, i have not pissed anyone off or mad for that reason. karma. i already have one green light. i don’t need another. trying to finish up this homework and taking a really quick break to write this. hope all had a better day. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

what a fast paced day. had a test and evaluation this morning. took several hours but it needed to be done. i will have to return on wednesday to finish the evaluation since today was a holiday. it was well over five hundred questions. after that i had to rush home and beat lunch hour traffic, made it home and had to take the dog out for his business first and then made me some chicken soup and added some rice and it came out better then expected. from there rushed to get to work and worked. work was over and had to crawl through traffic even though it was a holiday i think only kids were had the day off. got home and started to fix my bike, was able to relax while doing that and hear some tunes. came inside washed up for dinner and it is already early and a friend texted me to go bowling, i went for two games and left since i had class in the morning. i hope all had a good day. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

today was…well, a pushy day, i had to push through everything to stay on task; like turn off my computer and put phone away. hide myself from the world for a few hours to get notes read and readings done for my test tomorrow. my brain is a little worn out right now and my body feels it. i feel drained. it amazes me that the readings are right. couldn’t believe it but now i do. think i will keep reading them. the study group went alright, i really wish there were more coffee shops that were open everyday, twenty four seven. make me miss bennu. on top of worrying about the test i had a big scare with tumbler, he was being lazy and was lethargic all day, he wasn’t eating and wouldn’t get up and i though he might be getting parvo again, but no vomiting this time. thank god. my dad-like qualities came out, i tried everything to get him better. i am glad to report that he is doing better and my worry is gone from him now and shifted back to my test. hope everyone had a good sunday, i tried too. the week is over and now time to start a new week. it will be a very busy week for me, i will be up and down the city.still have lots to do. i wish everyone a good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

just checking in because today has felt as if i got ran over by a train. i woke up not feeling so well, the alarm woke me up, super grateful because i fell asleep really fast last night. i got up and felt as if the floor beneath me was spinning around in circles. no matter how i felt, i went to school. it was my preparation day for my test on this coming monday. made it there with some time to spare and was waiting for the professor to arrive, he was late again and open our door and took off to his office to grab his stuff. as the day went on, i got worse, my eyes were hurting and my brain felt mushy. i couldn’t think straight. arrived at work and they had a surprise for me, there was a new member added to my team, we hit it off pretty well. got to talking and had a lot to talk about in a short time but were separated moments later. lol. sorry kid. later on the director asked me what did i think about the new addition. i just said they were cool and they told me that they would be working with me on thursdays and fridays. uhh-ohh. lol. i was still feeling bad before lunch, decided to go to my favorite vegetarian restaurant near my work. felt a little better after eating and got back to work. work was work. got home and crashed out again for another four hours. i woke up and made a quick turkey sandwich with chips and my jug of water. well even now writing this i am still exhausted. going to make it an early night. i hope all had a great day. have a good night and happy dreaming.

O_o