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Tag Archives: world

well its been about a week now, it was time to get stuff done for a change, i am starting off the new year with some not so great news, in these past two months our family has lost three people because of illnesses. i don’t know what else is happening around the world, just in my world. we received a phone call early in the morning about the passing away of a cousins’ child. he passed away of leukemia. a few days ago we had another relative pass away with aids; i did mention it before in my previous blogs. then we received news of my uncle being admitted in the hospital for unrelated occurrences. my parents had to go out of the state and well, country. i did have a great conversation and i am super glad i was able to talk to you today, like i told you there are days i just don’t know what to say. i do miss our long talks we used to have. there are a few things i wish for but i will have to wait and see what will happen. i have to go attend to my family right now. good night and happy dreaming.

O_o

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time to wrap it up now, i cut myself off cold turkey from the social world to get things done, it did help, today everything is riding on getting my project turned in tomorrow. i am just hoping for a good grade, above all i have never withdrawn from a class and i wonder if staying was a good thing, the only thing that worries me is getting everything turned in. had way better days then today, something was off today, not sure what it was but i am certain something was off. time to sleep. i will get back to the social world tomorrow. i do miss it but i had to get things done and needed to take drastic measures if not i would have not been able to stay focused. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

 

what a day this federal holiday has been. it is veterans day and i had to go to school and work. i thought i would have a day to recover, woke up more rested then usual but obviously a little later too. made it to class with a minute to spare. sat in my seat and professor had just pulled out the grade book to recored if we were present or absent. i was lucky. after that was going to go straight to work but forgot to grab my badge. rushed home and checked in really fast and took off to work. stayed my usual hours but skipped lunch since i had lots track of time and a little before i left i started to get hungry. i was able to finish all of the work that was left over, had a few minutes to talk with the supervisor and then we were off. i thought it would be good to have pasta since i was craving it. i stopped by the store and picked up what i needed and arrived home cooking. i sat down trying to watch everything and was running around like a chicken with it’s head cut off. i got one of many reports finished and just completed the second one. thats why i am now writing this. tried to take a break and when ii did remembered what i had talked to the supervisor about and that why i had a few questions to ask. i really appreciate your help. i hope everyone has had a great day. but it is time for me to get some rest. falling asleep and got some busy days ahead of me. two to be exact. may you all have a good night and sweet dreams to you.

O_o

papers. papers. papers. so much trees being used up today. have stayed away from my computer all day until a few hours ago. today was just handed a boat load of work and on top of that i already have work to do for school. i decided to stay home and head to work early. they had told me to brace myself. i really thought they were joking. i was wrong. when someone sounds sincere they mostly are telling the truth. i was told what ever i didn’t finish to come in tomorrow to finish up. i didn’t want to decline the offer because i think it was a test to see how far i can be pushed, i did let them know even though it was a holiday i still had class to go to in the morning. i will be there after school to finish up. as the day came to an end i knew what was ahead. well not really because i got a feeling to read. read i did. it had been a while since looking at a few things, once you are blocked there is not much you can do but wonder. i tried wishing for certain things but when that failed me i started wishing for things to happen. in a way they were granted. i am very happy they did. i think that now that you are back in my life i can stop worrying about how you are and can ask you instead of imagining the worst. i am taking this leap to reach out in baby steps. i don’t want to ruin or rub the world in the wrong way. when you really left me it felt like the whole world did too. even my best friend stopped talking with me. no one was talking to me and i was going to school with no ambition to continue but i stuck with it because i have paid for classes out of my pocket and need them to graduate. but i can graciously say that today has gotten so much better. i think i just needed someone to spill some stuff too and before i texted you my best friend called me, but recently got in touch with me a few days before i went camping and has slightly refrained from being distant. i have seen too many papers for a day that i am taking a break from writing my reports and going to bed. it is tmie for bed and you have made my day from crappy to way way way better. i do wish i could say something but i wont. thanks. have a great night and very much sweet dreams. missed you so.

O_o

what a change of events today has been. i woke up really early thinking i was going to be late for class when i looked at my phone clock i had just remembered then that i had forgotten to change that one and was able to slow down my heart from racing. while on the way to school i took my normal route when all of a sudden there was a ton of traffic. i was still able to make it to school on time, which i was glad for. just as i had sat down at my desk four classmates had asked me what we had done last thursday. i think they asked because they have always seen me takes notes while they text and talk with each other during class. we were finally going over what i had been waiting since last class for. got to talk about buddha. with my recent change in views because of buddhist views on life i just stayed there quiet in my seat while the professor asked questions about him. but also in my defense i could’t multitask and answer the question and write the notes. i didn’t want to lose my train of thought. after school i headed off to work and did what was asked without hesitation. i am actually content with what i am doing. i could be making a bigger difference in the world, i just wont know until i see it. after work i get home and i am called from beneath the house and someone yelling at me to shut off the water valve. apparently twenty five years after a pipe was installed it finally gave in and burst. we caught it just in time before it flooded under the house. changed out of my work clothes and hopped into something more older that i could throw away later after getting dirty. well long story short after visiting four stores and five hours later i was finally able to fix the flooding from under the house from happening. i will have to transfer my notes later tomorrow during work and have them ready for next class. just got done getting ready for bed and going to have a light snack since i skipped dinner. i hope all had a way better day. for now; good night and sweet dreams to you.

O_o

 

what a spiraling day, it all started last night while dreaming; i was able to some how control the dream and what i did. it was as if my thought had a thought, i know it is hard to explain but it kind of reminded me of inception the movie, where they went into a dream state and in that dream state they had gone into another. i was thinking of what to do and my body would do just as i thought it. it was as if i could control my world. before i could get to controlling my dream i was woken up by my alarm. it was time for me to get up and get ready for school. after getting ready had some time and tried out the new coffee i had bought yesterday. it was really good. took off for school and learned a little bit more on the what was going on before the depression. i was awake, alert, excited to learn and what felt like a good mood. after leaving school to work i was early and decided to take some time and drive. made it to work and after heading inside is when the spiral of events began. everything went from good to bad to good to bad to good. by the time i knew it it was already time to go home. even though everything was spiraling out of control i remembered my dream and how i was controlling the dream, i did just that, i took the time to enjoy the slow traffic, in a sense that i was able to think in peace, without being distracted like usual when i get home. i had a lot to catch up on from school and work. i am taking time to get a really good grade, i am tired of failing. i don’t want to be a failure anymore. even though writing in my strong suit; i have too. i think i will be asking for help because i don’t know how to go about my research paper. i got the information but where do i sart; sort of thing. it is getting hard for me to think even though it is early. i just want to sleep. already ready for bed and going to sleep early. i hope all had a good day. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

 

update: alright world, i have watched you carefully and have done my best to take care of you. now i am putting my fate in you hands. and go!

O_o

today has got me thinking. i joined my friend and other friends in a race way out in the middle of no where. the scenery was like the one i had in my dream before i woke up this morning before we went there. it was just like when me and my brothers took our drive out of state to see one of the eight world wonders. it was very lush. of course some of it was man made but the rest was nature at it’s best. many things still left to do and the week is coming to an end. a new one is beginning at there are more things that will need to be get done, as far as tomorrow it will be really busy. i hope all had a good day. good night and happy dreaming.

O_o

is it crazy to say that my life just flashed before my eyes. what a day of doing everything i can, i know there is more meaning to this world and i am bound to find out what it will be. whoever enjoys a journey follow it, now you can’t say no one never told you as it has been told to me.

“it is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you will be”

no matter what, i shoot for the small to make the climb to the bigger. because what if fine isn’t good enough? what if what we search for is extraordinary. i am scared; everyday. our time is right here! right now! give it your all because there may not be another opportunity like the one that is in front of you. i just had this sort of feeling stir up in me these past few hours because the first step to better times is to imagine them. hope all had a wonderful day. may all have a good night and dream that dream.

O_o

today was just day three of what i am thinking anywhere from five to six day week to cram everything in one. was up early in the morning, got me some vegetarian dishes from the local hot spot. there was still more waiting in another office waiting room. because of that, i will have a more crazy day tomorrow before the weekend when it is time to sleep in, rest and hibernate from the world and maybe even be lazy and not do anything. but like it’s been said, ‘if you want to be somebody, if you want to go somewhere, you have to wake up and pay attention.’ i will have to do just that! after i waited and didn’t get what i needed, i went to grab me a late lunch. it was probably bad that i did but i did it anyway, not realizing the consequences until later today. i arrived back home and took off to the gym, with the lost weight i am feeling better inside and going to give the gym another try, with a little help from my handy dandy ipod. also with a change in my diet and continued exercise i can possibly get down to my ideal weight. a before and after kind of reveal to the world, if you will. so far everything is good but my shoulder are a bit sore and will just need to sleep off my soreness for another long day of many things to do tomorrow. it is time to get ready for bed and we will see you tomorrow.

reawakening O_o

today was suppose to be a day of working, what it turned out to be was a downer or bummer. my morning wasn’t so great, woke up at six thirty because of the pain killers wearing off; my foot was in a slight bit more of pain. my mom couldn’t see me suffer anymore and she decided we would head down to see the chiropractor but he wasn’t available due to family issues. then we went to see if my cousin knew anybody and had no luck there. as the day went on i rested on the couch, i knew what would be coming tomorrow and needed all the rest i could take. the pain i am in i can control, one wrong move and i pull the muscle and hurt myself, my parents are afraid if i don’t get this fixed now that it could come back later when i am older and haunt me and might possibly be worse. as if that wasn’t enough; i got an email reminder to pay my classes. if i didn’t i would lose them. well because i got a non passing grade during summer the school decided to deny my chance at getting aid. my tuition jumped to a whopping eight hundred dollars minus books. i had to drop out of a class in order to make a slight payment to even keep my classes. i am very bummed about that, but this isn’t getting me down that easily. i am a fighter and have always been. i want to rant out but what would be the point, it is my fault i could have gotten a better grade, formulas and steps are more difficult to follow sometimes for me. if i made this mistake it is time for me to take responsibility for my actions and put blame on me instead of the world. i do put myself down sometimes but i have to in order for me to learn not to do it again. i believe in myself as well as other see expectations in me too. i glad some people do believe. now it is my turn to appreciate everybody for that and show them there encouragement meant the world to me. i am very sorry if i have let anyone down, my time is now! i am seeing to much i don’t want to see. that is enough of my day, how was yours?

being responsible O_o

i am blowing up but not in the way most would think, my head is full of jumbled thoughts, like a never ending game of clue, i have all the pieces; it’s just that i can’t put them all together and figure out who did it. i know today would have marked a special day for us, i have stayed off the computer all day. my day really wasn’t excited today but it was full of remember-alls (hp lol) and me having a fight with my heart and brain and have been trying to figure out what to say. it is too personal to show to the world. you will know the pass by what i got for christmas.

thinking O_o