Skip navigation

Tag Archives: now

Before I forget and don’t get a chance to say this, from my absence for a while; Happy Holidays, Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas, Happy New Years, Happy Birthday and Happy Anything Else I have may forgotten in between now and the moment I return.

Much Love O_o

Advertisements

how much is too much? there is information one can’t un-know or un-see. part of me tell me he will come out okay and everything will be fine and the other half of me thinks that if it comes to the worse, it would be best to let go and wish for the best. i don’t really know if i am being selfish but it is in your hands now. whatever decision you make will be okay with me as long as i am able to say goodbye.

O_o

i have been so busy that i am addicted to books, paper, pen and writing. i have not been able to use my computer as  through all of this and i remember the days i always had something to do on it. i wonder how it would have been if the computer or internet was never invented. makes you think, huh?! i have gone through a writing pad already with notes and drafts of my reports before i can finally transfer them to the computer and print them out. work was easy but i was in solitary confinement for a good while, i was told to mark boxes. of course i had to make it fun, i would race agains the clock and in the four hours i was alone i was able to label over two-hundred boxes. they were surprised because the person who was doing them got through less then thirty in one hour. not to boast or anything but i could have possibly been working on my reports but i was getting cramps in my arms from lifting, writing, etc. as the day went on i was given an invitation to a boys baby shower; one of the workers wife was pregnant and i was invited without even really knowing the guy. should i go? or shouldn’t i? i just have to see how busy my day will be on thursday. when i got home i grabbed my ipod and threw the shuffle all songs on and i got strait to work, i am still not done now but am getting to tired to write and need a short brain recovery break. with that i am already for bed. i hope all had a good day. good night, sleep well amd sweet dreams.

O_o

what a change of events today has been. i woke up really early thinking i was going to be late for class when i looked at my phone clock i had just remembered then that i had forgotten to change that one and was able to slow down my heart from racing. while on the way to school i took my normal route when all of a sudden there was a ton of traffic. i was still able to make it to school on time, which i was glad for. just as i had sat down at my desk four classmates had asked me what we had done last thursday. i think they asked because they have always seen me takes notes while they text and talk with each other during class. we were finally going over what i had been waiting since last class for. got to talk about buddha. with my recent change in views because of buddhist views on life i just stayed there quiet in my seat while the professor asked questions about him. but also in my defense i could’t multitask and answer the question and write the notes. i didn’t want to lose my train of thought. after school i headed off to work and did what was asked without hesitation. i am actually content with what i am doing. i could be making a bigger difference in the world, i just wont know until i see it. after work i get home and i am called from beneath the house and someone yelling at me to shut off the water valve. apparently twenty five years after a pipe was installed it finally gave in and burst. we caught it just in time before it flooded under the house. changed out of my work clothes and hopped into something more older that i could throw away later after getting dirty. well long story short after visiting four stores and five hours later i was finally able to fix the flooding from under the house from happening. i will have to transfer my notes later tomorrow during work and have them ready for next class. just got done getting ready for bed and going to have a light snack since i skipped dinner. i hope all had a way better day. for now; good night and sweet dreams to you.

O_o

 

I just want to start off with that’s fucked up!!! everyone has always side swiped me with a weightful remark. I am pretty sure every bad thing that has happened to me is because of my size. yes I know I am fat! no need to keep rubbing it in my face. I have always struggled every since I was young, yes I was that husky kid who sometimes was out of breathe because of my asthma. as I look back growing up people used me as a safety net. you know who you are! but it has got to the point where my family and closest friend(s) keep trying to make a joke of it and laugh it off. yeah I laugh but what you are really doing is killing a little part of myself. everyone always goes to the big guy because he can’t hurt you or so you think. I have wrestled and won many of times with people twice my size, I will never forget the time when I didn’t know my own strength and nearly did something that could have hurt my cousin really bad and I broke a tall closet dresser from the force. I have also been used as a body guard, you know who you are, it was fun for a little bit but when you wanted me to get you from one place to another that was just too much, but me thinking you were a friend you got mad when I didn’t want too. how could I have been so naive?! I think today is the last straw. I have been put down one to many times lately. it ends now. everyone has been two-faced to me lately! and i mean almost everyone! how fucked up is it that the people closest to me have been so far away or have pushed themselves farther away. what have i ever done to you?!

a ver que pasa O_o

i missed class. yeah i over slept. i also fell asleep on my homework. mind you i got three things going on back to back. yeah it is tough. i gave you my word and i intend to follow through with it. even with everything happening. i was able to square a few things today. i am home from trying to do everything when all i need is a break but everything just keeps coming back. looks like i won’t be going anywhere this weekend, which is good, but at the same time i will be working. i have too. my career is depending on this one now. i did have a busy day, it is now over and completing my homework right now. i hope all had a better day. stay safe out there. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

it’s been said that there is an opportunity in every situation, but more often than the these opportunities are hidden from us. i have been trying to get to the bottom of the situation at hand, everything comes up. but for now, i am trying to set differences of perspectives aside and simply enjoy the positive aspects while i can.

O_o

while sleeping I had a great dream, a lot of what happened in my dream was great but that is another story I will make at a later time; when and if it actually happens. today began my conquest of trying to get everything ready for school. I went really early to see the director of the program for my degree and was the first one in his office. I told him what I wanted to do and he twenty questioned my points and views and i passed! he approved of my internship slot and he went over the trial and tribulations of what needed to be done during the internship. I have my heart set on one place for the sole reason that NO ONE has ever thought of going that route. I just have to hunt down another chairman and director of this location to get the “green light.” I really want to have this under my belt for future references and have been told by many and several past workers they like my work ethics and when I am determined to get something to not stop until I have it. I have been told if I were to ever need anything to not hesitate to ask because they were put in my path for a reason. the reason may never be know but discovered. i do have back up places but since it is a job, I may consider it in the future, I need everything to check out and be on point. I am very nervous and thrilled that I was one of twenty five to get the internship class through that director. I don’t want to be a disappointment but a great candidate for a future consideration of any opportunity that may possibly come my way one day. with everything I do there are a few things that need to be done before the end. I am only on day one! I know this is just the beginning but I have to get this done now. I never thought I would ever say this but it feels like a “now or never” kind of moment. and need all the help I can get.

to [blank] O_o

10 years ago…

How old were you? 13

Where did you go to school? Spring Branch MS – 8th grade

Where did you work? didn’t, wasn’t old enough too

Where did you live? in Bulverde

Where did you hang out? mall, theaters, school football games

How was your hair? short

Did you wear glasses? yes

Who was your best friend(s)? too many

Who was your crush? a 9th grader

How many tattoos did you have? none

How many piercings did you have? none

What car did you drive? couldn’t

What was your worst fear? clowns

Had you been arrested? nope

Had your heart been broken? wasn’t allowed to date
Now…
How old are you? 23

Where do you work? self employed

Where do you live? San Antonio

Where do you hang out? anywhere my car takes me

Do you wear glasses? rarely but contacts mostly

How is your hair? super short

Who are your best friends? 2 people

Still talk to any of your old friends? on occasion

Who is your current interest? no one

How many tattoos? none

How many piercings do you have? none

What kind of car do you drive?   Shelby my Nissan

What is your biggest fear? life & the world

Have you been arrested since, if so, how many times? still a nope

Has your heart been broken since then? yeah

Held a snake? no

Sang karaoke? yes

Laughed until you started crying? yes, kill myself sometimes

Do you cook? yes

being random O_o

taking a quick break from doing my homework, today was suppose to be about getting stuff done, I am getting stuff that I needed to do now, it is a bit late but have to read and work. work. work. work. I now know that when you said you were tired, i can honestly say now that i know how you feel. it is tough and getting tougher everyday. i hope to have strength enough to get this done. in conclusion, i know it is tough and need every bit of inspiration.

to getting some inspiration O_o

I found out something about me that I have only dreamed of telling someone if it was a problem or if it was just paranoia. come to realize that Fiesta and large groups of people frighten me for the extent that in this world I can only control one thing, that one thing is…ME! I can’t control every situation but I can sure prevent something bad from happening when I value life too preciously to have someone else ruin it for me at the blink of an eye or by surprise. I will ONE DAY overcome this fear/paranoia. It is the best I can do…FOR NOW.

O_o

As of today your Soul Mate is single, available right now and you have their phone number saved on your cell phone. You most likely talk to this person all the time. The problem is, you are too busy looking for that right person in all the wrong places. You have been dumped and disappointed countless times within the past few years, all because the people you’ve been chasing are too busy looking for their Mr or Mrs Right the same way you are. That is why you fail at love almost every time. But, you have 1 perfect partner in your life right now that you consider your ‘back-up plan.’ You don’t want to attempt to date your ‘Back-Up Plan’ because if it doesn’t work out then you are left starting from scratch. Its time to put that person center stage ‘NOW’ because it is quite possible that they are moving on and about to drop you totally. Who is that person you talk to regularly that may live out of town or isn’t quite the ‘winner’ you’re looking for, who always is honest, makes you feel good whenever you speak to them, has gone out of their way to accommodate you and would do anything for you if you asked? It’s time to give them a call because you won’t be able to much longer.