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Tag Archives: protect

today when i woke up from a wonderful dream i thought i had heard a noise. i washed my face and headed out the back door at my parents house. i had to go because my brother wanted to see a movie and i tagged along and when it finished i joined him to my parents with nothing but the clothes on me and my handy dandy iphone. after stepping outside i heard a clank. i asked myself; what is that noise?! it turns out it was three kittens. i was only able to get a hold of one while the others scrambled. it was funny because the other two ran one way and the one i caught ran into a box and it looked like he was disappointed from being caught. lol. it got me thinking while i held it in my hands; “wow! i have a small living organism in my hands right now.” for that moment i realized it was safe in my hands then from the world beyond my hands. if need be; i was able to protect a life. it also reminded me of what i used to do with you, i tried to protect you secretively. just so if something were to go wrong i always played out the senario out in my head for everything. i am just paranoid about life sometimes.

“life. it is so precious.”

i was also remembered of this test i took recently for a job to help lives. i was asked a question about my life, i answered as truthfully as i could. i did and i am in. as the day went on the day involved more lives to enter in my view. for the first time in many months we were all together. in a way that brought a smile to my face and the almost feeling of having something in my eye. ever since i was told, i have been more appreciative of all life. now with my current position i am able to help those who just need a little push in the right direction. i show what good can come. i think i found my niche. everyone has their own story to tell and it is interesting to listen. i know there are days where i need to talk but from a philosophical point i just need someone to hear me out and i would take what ever is told to me in consideration. even though i have been shut out from somethings i still have a lot to learn. given the opportunity i will continue to help others. i was asked why that makes me happy this weekend and my response to my brother was i like seeing people happy, if i can make one change and that person carries it on to another then i have just started a chain. if i were to help a hundred people and more then half carried it on that is still okay with me because i would know i made the attempt to help when no one else ever would. he was stunned by my answer; speechless to be exact.

after joining my visiting parents to the store, i saw a bunch of camping gear and now trying to plan a camping trip. it has been over two years now since i have been. it is now that time to reconnect with nature. i hope i can get it before turkey day or before winter is here. it is getting late now and have a busy day tomorrow. i hope all had a great day. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

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last night, well really this morning was crazy, fell asleep early last night without saying anything and woke up in the middle of the night with a crazy sound. sounded like bats fighting or something not so happy. wasn’t cats, dogs or birds because i know what that sounds like. it was around five in the morning when i heard it and of course tumbler heard it to and that proved that it wasn’t my imagination or dream. what sucked too was i was in the middle of a good dream but that’s another story for another day. well lately tumbler (my dog for those who read this and don’t know who that might be…lol) has been way over protective, i read a horoscope on dogs (don’t ask why) and it said he would be getting a stronger bond with his owner. it’s not the protection where you can’t get near us but when me and my brother or aunt play around he get in between us and tries to protect me by barking at them. i feel a great sense of security when he is with me for some reason, but those who know me know i am very paranoid about certain things, what ever the case may be, i know the problem but am trying to slowly overcome it. as the day continued i was left home alone while my brother was still sleeping and he heard a car approach, i didn’t because i was listen to music with my earphones and about thirty seconds later he heard the door open and began barking very loudly… he scared me half to death but it was just my cousin wanting to know some info on his car. with each day me and him are getting to exercise outside, even though it may be playing catch or just running wild; i feel beter, well my heart does, it doesn’t feel all slow and weak when it’s working like it did way back in the day, i figured out that even though i gave up fast food, i sneak a chicken sandwich about once a week when i have a huge craving, i do need my fatty acids too lol, but have not felt the urge to eat red meat, i think i can fully commit to becoming a vegetarian but as long as i still have my chicken and fish. maybe after many times i can get where i want to be. in conclusion here is to challenge number one for me and on to continuing step one and starting step two tomorrow.

to my being O_o