ideas

i have a few ideas with big corporations. what should i do? been talking with a few friends and i am getting a few different answers. i do need to make a decision and soon too. i hope it will work out. on the other hand today has been kind of strange. so many things to do and think of with just so little time. running around the city in the rain is no fun. my car hydroplaned several times on water and was not fun. was able to make it home safely but with the rain pouring down i decided it would be a great time to open my book and make some tea with that through on some jazz music along with that. it was quite relaxing, no one was home but the dog and me. but then i got really into reading that i lost track of time and realized that the football game was on and began watching it. well it it late and tomorrow is my make up day to finish and read all my homework and start getting ready to prepare for my test. have a good night and stay safe.

why?!

I sit here and I can not help but think: WHY?! why is it that I am changing my mind about what I want to do? I choose “this” because it was good for me; was it really?! or was it because I was told to do it because anything “I” wanted to do was a joke to most. as iI mentioned to my -other self- it is my turn to shine, NO MATTER WHAT! why must i kill myself to make ‘them’ happy when what I ask for is too much and get sent on a wild chase in the ‘pen’. THIS stops now! no more, I am putting my foot down, will ‘they’ ACCEPT or DENY? what it may be; I am not pushed over the edge anymore, how much more sacrifice do ‘you’ need? i am giving you my blood and sweat BUT you can not and will not take my heart or soul. I am very close to what my heart and soul desire and then it’s PEACE! and I will not have to speak to that typical mustache face of yours anymore. with a bit more research I will choose of you; like it or not I am going to choose correctly because I RUN ME and THAT’S IT!!