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Tag Archives: money

i have been asked what i want for christmas several times this whole week and my answer keeps to continue to be the same. what i really want can’t be bought. i don’t need anything because i have everything. this year i am not going to want anything. there are a few things i would like but for someone to get me them would probably break the bank, i don’t want that to happen, so i will wait till i can gather enough money to buy them on my own. something as small as a keychain would suffice for me. today was way better then yesterday, my parents had to go out of town again to see my uncle and drop stuff off. it kept me worried for the moment until i received a text saying everything went well and were safely on their way back home. once they did arrive i was happy again. i just stayed in watching weeds with my older brother and had my coffee in the afternoon because i didn’t have it in the morning. i am sleepy for some reason already and it is early. hope all have a safe night. good night and sweet dreams to you.

O_o

 

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this has got to  have been one of the strangest and weirdest weekends i ever had. it all started friday morning. slept in and other stuff was going on around me at the same time and i didn’t even know about. as the day went on something happened that i am not very proud of and has never ever happen to me; my keys; well i rather not say because it is too embarrassing, to say out loud let alone to write down in text. because of a phone call all of my plans had to be rescheduled or mainly modified. i drove.

drove for a bit. arrived and was able to settle in for a few minutes before going to search for my brother. he was celebrating his return back from visiting asia. how cool is that! pretty rad if you ask me. found him and i had that silent tear; you know the single one that is just released from your eye when you  are extremely happy, yeah that one. we and some other friends conversed. meanwhile below the border my parents went to visit my sick uncle and take him to a specialist farther outside of the city and back here i arrived home and got to thinking if there were new plans in the near future. but there is still so much i need to accomplish before some plans can go into effect.

after waking up i wasn’t feeling so well, mold and ragweed were high, but the crazy thing is i have never been allergic until then, the day went on and we went to have a dinner party for a friend who was born half a century ago. i was continuing to feel bad, i cut the night was short and headed home. i was almost asleep when i got a phone call to be a designated driver. i picked up my brother and friend from the road and returned back home to sleep. meanwhile i had received another call from my parents earlier that day that they were safely on there way back; or so i thought.

i was woken up to tumbler (my dog) getting sick and puking on the carpet. of course i had to get up really fast and remove and clean. i did just that. i had a few things to do. well more then a few. when i got to the dishes my mind stopped running a thousand miles an hour. i think the sound of water calms me down or maybe the feeling of water. i have yet to figure out what it is. by this time my parents were already home. i left this afternoon to go home. i was driven and met halfway through. we stayed for a bit and said our goodbyes after a little quality time that was there. on the way home my parents let me know what had happened. this is where it gets weird and strange.

apparently every time we had visited that part of the city we always end up losing and animal dearest to us. my mom had told me that our old dog had a cold for a few days now. even with all the care and medicine it didn’t help. my dad let her run free and she just walked to the back of the shed. normally she was a strong and brilliant dalmatian. she had a lot of what tumbler has know, i think he picked it up from her and some pointers from me as well. my dad said she was in plain sight and then she disappeared. my dad went looking for her when she wouldn’t answer her name being called out. she had walked farther away from from the house and removed herself from sight when she passed away. she passed away of natural causes, she was quite old. but she like our other dogs and pups will never be forgotten. we will miss you brittany, we love you girl. may you rest in peace and go visit our other canine family in doggy heaven. and if that wasn’t enough to bare, the kept going and told me what happened on the return trip.

while on their way back from the doctor and passing all the check points they were stopped by a federal cop truck and pulled off the side of the road. my dad was wondering what he had done wrong. it was broad daylight and he wasn’t drunk or speeding or being reckless in anyway shape or form. the official asked my dad to step out of the car and pop the trunk and hood of the rental car. he inspected the hood quickly and then returned farther away from the car with the trunk still opened. he asked my dad several questions. my dad answered with no problem. it was until the official assumed my dad had money and was lying. on a side note my dad has never done any of that, he is a well respected contractor in the business. he normally doesn’t carry a high amount of money on his person. as the official he told him that he would be going to jail. he brought out handcuffs and asked him what he wanted to do, at this point my dad was thinking that he was never going to see his wife, kids and family ever again. he was thinking the worst possible. as i am hearing this i am furious and thinking to myself, if anything like that ever were to happen i would pull the sort of stunt that you see in movies. i’ll just leave it at that.

he offered his last one hundred dollar bill to the official, mind you the officer had a loaded machine gun. while all this is going on my mom, aunt and uncle are in the car trying to listen and see what is going on. but they can’t since they were far away from the car. no one around for miles. they told him that he was going to jail and whoever was in the car would go about there business. at the same time there are three other men in the truck and also with loaded weapons. my dad highly believe what was going down was, what has been seen on the news lately over the border. with the offering my dad said that was his last hundred dollar bill and it was for the return trip home. the man was furious and said if he wanted them back that he would be sent to jail. the man refused to take the money where the others would see and the official asked him to make it as if they were shaking hands to make the swap. luckily the man let them go. my dad was saying at that moment in time he felt his life was just worth a hundred dollars and that the other guy could care less what happened next.

as they pressed on to reach the border my dad said he felt dead inside. no feeling what so ever. literally as if his life flashed before his eyes. he said no matter what until this drug war and corruption continues he would not return; until it is fixed. by the looks of things doen’t look like it will be stopping anytime soon. as soon as they hit american soil was when he felt alive again. we were on protected and safe soil. with great appreciation of cops and other s who serve, he know saw why we our such a great country.

my mom was saying what would happen if it did actually happen. but instead i swayed her mind from thinking like that and know there is a higher power that can protect with some faith. i didn’t know whether to me sad or angry at what happened but all i know is that i had the biggest epiphanies this weekend due to everything that happened this weekend. there are other missing parts to this story but i am choosing to leave them out. it makes me angry at what they are doing., hurting innocent people for a few extra bucks in their pocket tax free. there is more i would like to say but can’t.

some things will be looked into because of my epiphanies, let’s just see what happens. i am extremely tired and i wish everyone stays safe. have a good night and dream happy dreams.

O_o

i have to say thank you. thank you so much for everything you have done for me. as much as i don’t deserve it thank you. you have got me out of quite a few things that i know one day i will repay you back for. even though we are blood, still; i know one day i will get it all back to you as mint as possible. it make take a while but i know i could never thank you enough. stay safe out there tonight, to others good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

today was suppose to be a day of working, what it turned out to be was a downer or bummer. my morning wasn’t so great, woke up at six thirty because of the pain killers wearing off; my foot was in a slight bit more of pain. my mom couldn’t see me suffer anymore and she decided we would head down to see the chiropractor but he wasn’t available due to family issues. then we went to see if my cousin knew anybody and had no luck there. as the day went on i rested on the couch, i knew what would be coming tomorrow and needed all the rest i could take. the pain i am in i can control, one wrong move and i pull the muscle and hurt myself, my parents are afraid if i don’t get this fixed now that it could come back later when i am older and haunt me and might possibly be worse. as if that wasn’t enough; i got an email reminder to pay my classes. if i didn’t i would lose them. well because i got a non passing grade during summer the school decided to deny my chance at getting aid. my tuition jumped to a whopping eight hundred dollars minus books. i had to drop out of a class in order to make a slight payment to even keep my classes. i am very bummed about that, but this isn’t getting me down that easily. i am a fighter and have always been. i want to rant out but what would be the point, it is my fault i could have gotten a better grade, formulas and steps are more difficult to follow sometimes for me. if i made this mistake it is time for me to take responsibility for my actions and put blame on me instead of the world. i do put myself down sometimes but i have to in order for me to learn not to do it again. i believe in myself as well as other see expectations in me too. i glad some people do believe. now it is my turn to appreciate everybody for that and show them there encouragement meant the world to me. i am very sorry if i have let anyone down, my time is now! i am seeing to much i don’t want to see. that is enough of my day, how was yours?

being responsible O_o

money is just an inanimate object to me, everyone always assumes that I need to worry about money, when in fact, I can honestly say I could care less, I spend it idiotically anyways. buying things I shouldn’t. yeah I know money doesn’t grow on trees and what not but even with all the money in the world, it absolutely can not buy you love or happiness. some may think so. but when growing up from nothing to having something, that is what makes a person, not by what they own, drive, live, wear, etc. the only thing money is used for is to buy things we want but not need, while I was out, there where things I saw that I would have liked to have, but what would have been the point of buying it, I had no where to put, hold, show, wear, smell it. I am very very grateful for what I have now, I am not one to brag or boast, because that is a sin. judge all you want, but I will say this, you wish you could have what I do, it makes me a bigger and better person to accept what I have or even had that I don’t need to change because it wouldn’t help me out. all you need to survive is food, clothes, water, shelter and a washroom. I don’t need fancy things to get ahead. I just need my brain.

ranting O_o

today was crazy, made it to class and was learning new new things that I totally couldn’t remember after that was over went home. i felt shelby rumble, not in a good way while going home. checked it out and seems likes her insides are slowing down a bit, i mean 11 years is a long time with out any inside checks. drove around looking and asking for prices, everywhere wanted to charge me $1500+ to get rebuilt insides. which in my case wasn’t good. it was heartbreaking to see how much it would be to fix it. have to start saving to get her really fixed up. ran around so much that I totally forgot that my brothers gf graduation was at 4, she was one of the first ones to get called out and was hearing all the scholarships they were being offered and made me think, why when i graduated could they have said that about me, i know i half assed my way through HS but it has made the person i am today. i am in school now and will be working hard to be able to hear my name called out. i hope soon. in conclusion, no more playing around at school, time to buckle down and get to it, i aint getting any younger.

schoolin’it O_o

school went very well began learning new things like how to use synthetic division. was let out a bit early and 3 minutes later the rain came, I was soaked and so were my chucks. got home to dry off before heading to the bank to make a deposit. did that and had my little brother with me because he wanted to change his gym account, seems like were opening up to each other as brothers now. before we used to be distant, it kind of sucked that i had no best friend and he is family, what I don’t need right now is negativity, but I will take caring and all the positivity anyone will give. i am open for that or encouragement or advice too. these 6 weeks will be tough because of so much information crammed into them, I was told it would be a at-your-own-pace kind of class, it is in a way but need to get started on the homework but in order to start have to buy the code, quite expensive just to use a database, in my opinion, but I guess that is life! went to the library to check out some books on juvenile crimes and the book I really needed was reference, looks like I will be spending time doing some reading and work at the library, a first for me. here I go! wish me luck, diving right in!

to re-re-learning school O_o