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Tag Archives: information

how much is too much? there is information one can’t un-know or un-see. part of me tell me he will come out okay and everything will be fine and the other half of me thinks that if it comes to the worse, it would be best to let go and wish for the best. i don’t really know if i am being selfish but it is in your hands now. whatever decision you make will be okay with me as long as i am able to say goodbye.

O_o

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i don’t want to be mean but some people need to know what to say before they speak. i know you folks are misinformed but look it up. what i study shall not be brought up during work, especially when the boss is around. that is termination talk. i know you probably got mad when i wouldn’t explain myself, but what i do is my business. my religion has nothing to do with it, i told you as much as i wanted to so you could think about it and if you are interested you will look it up online.

on another not the semester is coming near a halt. i don’t know what i should do but i do know how to get there. as crazy as that sounds. i feel like just curling up in a dark room to see what happens. i have worked hard but what i really want is to work full time with what i have learned. i like working, i do not slack, i press on even though i am there fo a short period of time. i know what i was put on this earth to do. yes i figured it out mom and dad all by myself. there is one thing i am waiting for and i wish you would say it.

i have had to many things blow through my brain today. i wanted to relax and after work my parents wanted me to get them the third toy story, it was sad but really good. made me think a lot more after the movie. started looking for my journal and i found something, i had forgotten about it but not sure how to go at it. i wrote the few ideas down, if they work, they work! if they don’t then i will modify them until they do work. it is time to sleep, hope all had a good day. may you have a good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

what a spiraling day, it all started last night while dreaming; i was able to some how control the dream and what i did. it was as if my thought had a thought, i know it is hard to explain but it kind of reminded me of inception the movie, where they went into a dream state and in that dream state they had gone into another. i was thinking of what to do and my body would do just as i thought it. it was as if i could control my world. before i could get to controlling my dream i was woken up by my alarm. it was time for me to get up and get ready for school. after getting ready had some time and tried out the new coffee i had bought yesterday. it was really good. took off for school and learned a little bit more on the what was going on before the depression. i was awake, alert, excited to learn and what felt like a good mood. after leaving school to work i was early and decided to take some time and drive. made it to work and after heading inside is when the spiral of events began. everything went from good to bad to good to bad to good. by the time i knew it it was already time to go home. even though everything was spiraling out of control i remembered my dream and how i was controlling the dream, i did just that, i took the time to enjoy the slow traffic, in a sense that i was able to think in peace, without being distracted like usual when i get home. i had a lot to catch up on from school and work. i am taking time to get a really good grade, i am tired of failing. i don’t want to be a failure anymore. even though writing in my strong suit; i have too. i think i will be asking for help because i don’t know how to go about my research paper. i got the information but where do i sart; sort of thing. it is getting hard for me to think even though it is early. i just want to sleep. already ready for bed and going to sleep early. i hope all had a good day. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

 

had a busy day, a busy one that i was constantly jumbling trying to do four things at once. i had files i had to see, read, file and anything else you do with a government file. all the information was small that i had to keep constantly keep looking at what i was doing. it wasn’t as difficult as they said it would be, i got it done as fast and neatly as i could, i ran over a few files that surprised me, i thought for a few moments they were a conflict. as i continued to close it it wasn’t. it is that kind of information that i valuable to all. i could get in a lot of trouble for making a copy or even taking it out the office. these files contain a lot of personal information that is not public knowledge as some records are now-a-days. after lunch i had many more files to do. i had to stay later then usual to finish up. i have an insane day tomorrow. i don’t think any of my busy days will compare to any of my other busy days. going to have to take it one piece at a time. here goes. time to sleep. good night and sweet dreams.

O_o

i have been obsessed with a song and keep listening to it over and over, if i go anywhere i hear it at least 1-5 times on the radio or more depending on how long i am driving for. the verse that jumps out at me the most is “can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars, i could really use a wish right now!” – B.o.B ft H. Williams because we all know that everyone could use at least one wish. today marked a eventful; if you want to call it that; day, woke up, got ready for class had my breakfast and headed off, even though it was raining, I wasn’t going to let the grey skys get me down. got to class and finished my exam, suprisingly all the formulas and steps to complete some problems came back to me while taking the exam. I was very proud of myself; for the first time in a long time. it feels really good when acomplishing a task. well after that was done headed home to find marked papers saying they had to be turned in today, grabbed them all and drove!
well my trip started from downtown and ended about 15-20 miles northbound, it was intense and not to mention the visibilty wasn’t so good because of the rain. once I finished with that I headed home, well I didn’t know what to do and was running around the city that it did a huge toll on me and I decided to nap. well, that nap really energized me once I woke up. began watching netflix and finished book one of avatar: the last airbender, it’s been said that that’s a cartoon that was out when I was younger but I never can recall. it is very good and am continuing book two and will eventually get through all four. now I want to go see the real movie because I am more informed on it. in conclusion i am learning new things everyday and even though i fried my brain i know it helped me grow, i have never applied myself and stuck with it, until now that you have shown me. i guess what i am trying to say is thank you and i don’t think i will ever stop thanking you.

thinking of you O_o

school went very well began learning new things like how to use synthetic division. was let out a bit early and 3 minutes later the rain came, I was soaked and so were my chucks. got home to dry off before heading to the bank to make a deposit. did that and had my little brother with me because he wanted to change his gym account, seems like were opening up to each other as brothers now. before we used to be distant, it kind of sucked that i had no best friend and he is family, what I don’t need right now is negativity, but I will take caring and all the positivity anyone will give. i am open for that or encouragement or advice too. these 6 weeks will be tough because of so much information crammed into them, I was told it would be a at-your-own-pace kind of class, it is in a way but need to get started on the homework but in order to start have to buy the code, quite expensive just to use a database, in my opinion, but I guess that is life! went to the library to check out some books on juvenile crimes and the book I really needed was reference, looks like I will be spending time doing some reading and work at the library, a first for me. here I go! wish me luck, diving right in!

to re-re-learning school O_o