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Tag Archives: hell

I guess yesterday’s paper was right. Was going to feel like I was hit by a bus. It’s only at the end of the day where I can piece every thing together.

it happened again O_o

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wow! really?! that has got to be one of the most frequent things i have been hearing about myself from others lately. i am too nice! was talking with some old friends today and have found out that; for the fourth and fifth time now; that i am a nice person. it seems to be portrayed as a bad thing. when can i show the world that good does still exist in this world and it’s a good thing?! really guys. c’mon! i couldn’t believe my ears. is being “bad” a good thing?! i live my life “safe” as some people believe to be a bad thing; for the reason that i have been through hell and back. for those who know me and my family know best; very few people actually do. i became the person you know today for personal reasons that i didn’t want to end up like a few, well many close relatives i know. it is a tragedy. breaks people’s hearts, especially even if one day you know you will one day get that phone call when something bad has happened or worse. is it wrong that a few beliefs i have can be appreciated by some, and not by all. but then again; it is my life! i am in no way saying i am perfect because i am not but still, live my life with morals to one day show others that not all we do can be a stigma and carry on with our legacy. i don’t know whether to be angry or disappointed. but after hearing it five times from different people, it astonishes me; really! i guess people’s perception of good is actually bad. wow! i really can’t believe it. even after this i still hope everyone has a great night. deuce.

por siempre O_o

everyone always talks about time as if it is something we can control, how time works i really don’t know, came across something today; “time doesn’t heal anything, it just teaches us how to live with the pain.” – Naomi Remen, which i find to be true, i have said it before and i will say it again, i have seen my version of hell and back and i don’t like it one bit, i would never wish anything i have seen or done upon someone. there are things that i have seen and have happen that i wish no one would ever have to go through, but i guess if it doesn’t happen, we wouldn’t be able to learn to change or fix situations. talking about things does help, but the person you really want to talk can’t help in any which way or form. does the perception they have of the situation help any by repeating it? or does the advice given be taken or heard when the situation at hand has never happen to them?? i am just trying to do the best thing but am i doing the right thing??? everyone always says “follow you heart” and some concur that the heart is just an organ unlike the brain which has a side that no one can see but oneself and listen to it too. can it be that giving up is the answer, some say it’s a lost cause and is not my burden to carry but when in reality it is as much burden as anyone else? i am feeling that i am becoming something i said i would never be, how or what can i do to change this?? if anyone has ever felt this way, what is the best advice that can be passed on? in conclusion, do i speak and ask for help or do i keep my mouth shut and carry on my day, like any other?!?!

to feeling … O_o