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Tag Archives: hate

everything went as planned today, except i wasn’t expecting to have a heart to heart with someone this afternoon, but it happened. even on top of the jokes and laughs today, it felt serious. i have been on a roller coaster of things, many things will be revealed soon enough but before they do, i now know what must be done to get where i want to be. it will be difficult but everything usually is with me. i know i am accepted, hated, liked, loved and enjoyed but as you know i do only have two hands and two feet. when i do need the help i will ask because i know i have been there for anyone who ever may needed something. my brain is hurting and it’s time for bed. good night and happy and sweet dreams.

O_o

 

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it says to be truthful; so here goes, i have been bombarded with questions of me not working, to be honest i really don’t like having a boss or someone shoving me around, i really like the idea of me being my own boss. it is a tough thing to do but starting today i am now an entrepreneur! my only job that i really like was; sadly enough; abrecrombie, even though i had a boss, he really wasn’t a boss to me, he gave me power to be my own boss and because of him i joined the corporation for two years but once he was gone i lost that privilege. i was working just to be able to listen to the music. crazy to say but it is true, my inspiration to be a better dj was in the store. even when he was gone i was taken of my “title” but it was only stripped for a short time, when the rotation of four new managers came in, three of them gave me that power and had the same passion for music as i did and things went back to normal. i was able to be happy working, everyone hated me; like always; because i was able to release some of my mixes live on the sales floor. it felt really great when people came up to me and asked me questions about my love for music. i am slowly getting that feeling back, i have remastered an old project that i had started because a friend and her friends liked my stuff and asked if i would ever release a new type of mix, from way back in the day when i started to now there has been a whole new music list that needs to be updated. i am still in the editing process and it still isn’t right, in my ears. to me a dj is someone who can adapt to anything, which i have been able to with all my genres of music. everyone i know likes more of a specific type of music and they all have different taste, i personally wouldn’t be able to choose one, i like them all, even though there are a few exceptions. i have been taught that i should love what i do instead of taking the easy way out; they are right! i have read a few things and do like what i have read. it is a completely different way of life but every survey i take comes up with the same answer(s). i know i can’t be what i dream of being but maybe it is a different significance with the same attitude, may not make sense now but if and when i am done; i will be my own boss and make my own rules and will be able to say something that is at the tip of my tongue right now and i have always wanted to say. in conclusion i am getting closer to what i was meant to be.

to me being me O_o