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well my parents just arrived, wished my pops a happy birthday, he is now three decades older then me, it is crazy to think he still looks young for his age despite the peper hair, in his line of work i know how hard it is, if anyone thinks there job is hard, i beg to differ, i would put my salary on it. i can guarantee that NO ONE can last a day in his shoes. that is a promise. he is my hero and i have always seen him like that, even when i found my report of the greatest hero ever; i listed him. i know he wants the best for all of us, everyone does. i am breaking my head trying to show my dad i can over come anything but right now i feel like i am going to explode, i stopped myself from having a headache by telling myself i had no time to deal with it and it went away shortly after getting back to my studies. what i thought was going to be easy really isn’t, this is the toughest thing i have ever done, try to manage two classes on my own time. even with all the time in the world i am afraid i am slipping from the good into the bad, i am not trying to sabotage myself because i love to learn, i just need a little time to be able to figure it all out, but the thing is i don’t have the time that i would need. my brain feels fried but i want to keep moving forward and on top of all that my parents just let me know that my uncle is really sick, he is in mexico and they were there visiting him again, when it’s not one thing it’s always another. can or will this family ever get a break. i guess me trying isn’t good enough, i guess i will have to do everything to pull through on this one, i am seriously thinking of just rolling into a ball and letting go. i don’t know what to do anymore. in conclusion do i fight for what is right or just accept what is?

to needing it O_o

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