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today begins the hardest road of my life, recently I have been skipping the morning and noon time to indulge myself. I have been finding to smell of all food disgusting and the sight of food gross. also have not been feeling well after eating red meat but other food (poultry or seafood) have no effect on me at all, analyzing it more; me of all people turning down some food, when I would usually say any food i eat “fills the cracks of the heart.” I began thinking while working that all I need to survive is water, but how long can I go on for without food?! everyone keeps asking what is wrong with me, if I knew I would tell them. I think now that I am hard at work and busting my tail and breaking a sweat I am releasing all my bad things in my body and dropping weight, I have already dropped a waist size and 7 pounds in water weight. I am liking the dropping of the weight because it makes me feel better (mentally & physically) but not liking that I can not eat when I should be. it scares me that I could possibly have something wrong (heart, diabetes or stomach problem) with me. I have been in a nutrition class and give others advice on how to eat BUT TODAY MAY 17, 2010 MARKS THE DAY OF CHANGE (also marks 3 months after my birthday; that is irrelevant), it is my turn to have the ridicule STOP dead in its tracks because looking in the mirror everyday is getting to be a spiteful thing. I now want my health to be good, a good health brings good fortune and good waves of energy. I want to live a long, healthy and prosperous life like all the successful beings out there.

here is to CHANGE & LIVING O_o

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